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Zarqawi Spoke and I Have the Transcript

It’s being reported the terrorist leader, Al-Zarqawi was alive for a brief period of time after his hideout was struck by two 500 pound bombs. Not only did he survive in agony for a short while, it was also said that he mumbled something to the American Special forces.

Luckily, The Intelligence Report was provided an actual transcript of the terrorist’s final words.

Zarqawi: “you know how people say that right before you die your life flashes before your eyes? Well that’s true. I remember when I was 10 years old and my uncle sat me on his lap and asked me to find his keys. I was his number one key finder…I guess because I always knew he left them in his pants. He was a great uncle.

I also remember the time when I took part in a Mexican Donkey show. Man! That donkey sure did love me. I miss him. Oh, I can’t forget the time that my jihadist brothers would draw penises on my head when I slept. Boy did they love me, my brothers…they knew how much I loved the penis.

But what I remember most is how much I loved being sodomized. After a good night of ten guys playing doctor with my ass I would ponder giving up this whole quest for 72 virgins. I loved taking it in the ass."

Well, those were Zarqawi's last words right before he died. This is according to my high-level intelligence sources.

Wow, that's dumb as shit. Nice job.

Brad... I am gonna side with you on this one. It's like a 13 year old took over someone's blog and started posting all their potty mouth chat. There has to be better immature ways to get out your repressed pent up preteen angst.

My high level sources are rarely wrong...

That’s what the guy said

Seems to me that Brad is the king of "repressed pent up preteen angst".

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